Thursday, February 2, 2012

The Family in the Mirror

"If you want to change the World...
Start with your own Family."
~Mother Teresa~

Got that cup coffee ready? Let's chat.

Our Mission is to teach our children to serve our Father.  We are working monthly on family outreach ideas... some simple, some more complex... but all working toward servant's hearts for our children.

Yet, first and foremost, they must learn to love family.  It is the learning blocks to the future relationships.  But, boy, oh boy! It's tough to teach children to love each other!

Our older children have very kind hearts toward others and often surprise us with their sensitivity.  But, at home? With each other? Some days I think they have declared war on each other! 

Lately, attitudes and tones of voices have been... um... rocky.  I find myself sounding like a broken record!!  "Speak nicely. No yelling.  Be kind......." 

So my dear husband has decided that since simple apologies do not work at correcting the behavior and establishing the desired behavior...
  • Mistreating a sibling (either verbally or physically... either mild offense or strong offense) = timeout (regardless of their age!)
  • An apology is required (Not just a mumbled "Sorry", but "I'm sorry I yelled at you for standing near my door")
  • For EACH undesired behavior, the child must do TWO good things for the offended child... they decide the two good things, not mom or dad (Ex: "NO! THAT'S MINE!" while jerking away a toy... "I'm sorry I yelled at you and grabbed the toy. (1)Would you like to play cars in my room? (2)Here, this red one is my favorite, but you can play with it for now.")
The goal being:  To make them STOP and THINK before REACTING to their sibling. 

They are also guided in the 'right' way of handling the situation should it arise in the future. (Ex: Instead of "GO AWAY!!!...  "It really bugs me when you stand over my shoulder like that while I am on the computer. Could you please find something else to do?... Mom, I've asked him/her to please find something else to do while I am doing my math lesson, but he/she will not go away. Could you help?" - without whining or bratty attitude, of course!)

God has given us such an amazing, awesome, HUGE responsibility in raising each of these precious Blessings!  So we continue to pray and seek His guidance in this crazy, exciting, rewarding path of parenthood.  We continue to do our Monthly Family Outreach projects. And we continue to focus on the heart of each of our children, daily... teaching them to love each other, daily.

“Thus I command you to love one another.
John 15:17(MSNT)

When we change our hearts at home... we CAN change the WORLD!  It will just spill over into every thing we do! So, in the words of an old song... (go ahead, sing along, I did...)

"If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself and then make the change
You gotta get it right while you got the time
’Cause when you close your heart, then you close your mind
With that man in the mirror , oh yeah
I’m asking him to change his ways
Better change, no message could have been any clearer
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself and then make a change"

Man in the Mirror / Michael Jackson

And oh, if you have a great idea to use in training these hearts... be sure to leave a comment for me and the other readers... Thanks! :)

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